BLEEP!
by dancingdeaky
Summary: When Fanny babysits Rachel's twins, she and Kuki accidentally teach a couple of toddlers some interesting new words. Rated T for swearing. Random one-shot for the laughs.


***I do not own Codename: Kids Next Door***

**The names were inspired by other future stories, cause I'm unoriginal af oops.**

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"Charlotte!"

Fanny was tired, panting loudly, her face a light pink. Rachel asked her to babysit her twins, Lara and Christopher, but her daughter was a _very_ bad influence on them. Just about ten minutes ago, her daughter made the other two throw off their diapers and dance around naked. And one of them appeared to have a certain _accident_ as they ran around the house.

_Could this day get any harder?!_

She groaned loudly as she took out her chair and plopped herself onto it.

_DING DONG!_

"Wow, just as ah catch a break." Fanny muttered to herself.

She got up at an instant, ignoring the muffled screaming and footsteps drawing nearer; those children were such daredevils. She opened it, the sight of it was a Kuki with a stroller, her huge smile beaming.

"Hey!" Kuki greeted.

"Not anymore children! I've got enough on my plate." Fanny grunted.

"Who are you babysitting this time?" Kuki asked her.

"Lara and Christopher." Fanny answered, gesturing Kuki to enter her house, in which she complied. The two sat down on the table. Just at that moment, the other toddlers ran up to Kimi and Hannah.

"Hey!" they all exclaimed.

"Where are your diapers?" Kimi asked them.

"Where is your brother?" Christopher asked them.

"He's out with our dad." Hannah said.

"Well okay then." Charlotte shrugged.

"But now, you guys need to take off _yours_." Lara stated, pointing to their diapers.

"Okie-dokes!" they both responded together.

"Oh, I almost forgot the reason I came here!" Kuki said in realisation.

She immediately went to her stroller, taking out a white handbag from the bottom. "This is yours." She handed it over to her in an instant.

"Ya borrowed this from me almost a year ago." Fanny said, her face scrunching up as she took the bag.

Kuki lightly blushed, before hesitating, "And now I'm giving it back to you." She smiled nervously.

"Also, this isn't even _my_ bag! _I_ borrowed it from _Rachel_!" Fanny added.

"Oh, God no!" Kuki let out a deep breath, one she didn't even know she was holding.

"What d'ya mean?" Fanny queried, confusingly.

"Well…" Kuki began, rubbing the back of her neck.

Just then, they heard several giggles from behind. Kuki shrieked loudly as Fanny gasped angrily.

"Charlotte!" Fanny yelled.

"Yes mommy?" Charlotte squeaked innocently.

"Stop telling the other toddlers to take off their diapers! Now put it back on. Same goes for you, Christopher and Lara." Fanny instructed.

"You too, Kimi and Hannah." Kuki added.

"Okay." Kimi, Hannah, Christopher and Lara murmured in annoyance.

Yet Charlotte didn't oblige. "No." She said firmly.

"No?!" Fanny asked in astonishment.

"Well, I don't know where me diaper is." Charlotte said sheepishly.

"Me too!" Christopher and Lara said in unison.

"Sweetie," Fanny sighed, "just go and find it, then come back."

"Fine." She muttered, turning her heel off to the other room, the other toddlers following after her.

"So," Kuki started again, slightly turning red, "I went to buy some food-"

"Did'ya by any chance bring me some?" Fanny asked, interrupting her.

"Well yeah. That's the thing, it's in the bag." Kuki said.

"Well okay- KUKI!" She screeched. Inside the white handbag appeared to be an explosion of food. The entirety of it was filthy.

"I am SO sorry Fanny! It was an accident!" Kuki said apologetically.

"That's not the main issue here! This is Rachel's bag! And it's a fucking white bag!" Fanny yelled.

"Rachel will literally whoop my ass! This is why she never lets me borrow her shit!" Kuki shrieked.

Just as their panic and worry could have gotten any worse, they heard a little squeak from behind them.

"Fucking."

They each turned as they heard Rachel's twins say the curse word.

"I've never heard of that word before." Charlotte said, a smile beaming on her face. "Or 'ass' and 'shit'."

"Don't say that word!" Fanny instructed to her in a serious tone.

"Why?" Charlotte asked, yet her question was overcome when Kuki's daughter's said the swear.

"Mommy said 'shit'." Kimi said.

"Your mommy also said 'ass'." Lara added.

"Wonder what it means?" Christopher wondered aloud.

"We should ask Butch**_(A/N: They're triplets, Butch is their brother(Inspired by a story I read))_** when we go home." Hannah said.

"You do not say the words 'fucking, shit or ass' again, okay?" Kuki insisted.

"And why not?" Hannah asked.

"Yeah, daddy said them." Kimi stated.

"Oh did he now?" Kuki's eyes widened. "Boy is Wally gonna hear about this tonight."

"Just, don't say them." Fanny repeated.

"But mommy, you can say them." Charlotte said.

"I'm a grown up though." Fanny explained.

"We could be grown ups if we wanted to!" Charlotte exclaimed, gesturing to all the toddlers.

"Yes. We. Can!" Lara chanted.

"No you can't." Kuki said.

"And don't tell your mommy that you said those words." Fanny told Lara and Christopher.

"Said what words?"

Each of them slowly turned from where the completely recognisable voice came from.

"Rachel!" Fanny gasped loudly.

"You left your door open. I was just about to pick up the twins." Rachel explained. "Now, what words?" Her hands were now on her hips, she was growing more impatient by the second.

"Aunt Fanny and Aunt Kuki told us not to say 'fucking, shit or ass'." Christopher replied.

"Yeah, just because we're not grown ups!" Lara added.

Rachel slowly turned to Fanny and Kuki, her eyes opened wide. "How dare you say that in front of my kids?!"

"Kukiputfoodinyourwhitehandbag!" Fanny blurted.

Rachel gasped loudly. "You did WHAT?!"

"Fanny was the one who ripped up your emerald dress, not me!" Kuki yelled.

Fanny became red. "Kuki stole your cookies for Mommy & Me last week!"

"Fanny was the one who put a scratch on your car!"

"Kuki once lost Lara and Christopher on a bus!"

"You did the same thing with Charlotte!"

"It was Patton's fault!"

"So that means I can blame mine on Wally!"

"Wally wasn't there!"

"Who cares?! Fanny accidentally dropped Lara when she was 2!"

"And Kuki did the same thing with Christopher!"

"At least Lara wasn't calling me 'Fanny bang'!"

"Puh-lease, she didn't say that! You just got that from _Friends_!"

"Well..." Kuki looked around the room before a lightbulb lit in her head, "Fanny stole money from your wallet last week!"

"That wasn't _me_, that was _you_!" Fanny snapped.

"How did you know?!" Kuki shrieked in confusion.

"Because you told me!" Fanny retorted.

Kuki sat there thinking, then lightly blushed. "Oh yeah. I ran out of things to say."

"You guys actually did that stuff! Oh, you bitches are about to-"

"Now 'bitches' is a new word." Charlotte stated.

The other toddlers mumbled in agreement.

The three adults stared at each other nervously, before yelling, "Don't say that word!"

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**So, that was very random. Hope you enjoyed and review!**


End file.
